All I WANTED TO HEAR.
The day started all well. I woke up and started the day with a prayer. Eat my breakfast and do my devotion.
As I do my devotion, I decided to level-up my date with the Lord. So, I added 4 chapters in my devotion. My devotion was good.I heard God checking my patience to one of my girls. I was marking every warnings, promises and commandments. There in my devotion God was talking about Lot i just marked the verse and disregarded. I just clinged my ears to what I wanted to hear. In my heart, I was convicted that there is more God wants to tell me. I continued in my journal then prayed.
HERE IT COMES.
On my way to the people's park, my patience was really tested, faith somewhat wavered because of my girls who doubts if they can go to the God-encounter retreat. I knew that Satan was really doing this to hinder us.
As I was texting my girls about the progress of their registration fee and the approval from their guardians and parents. I waited for a reply and... at last! One of my girls, *April replied that she can't go in the encounter because her Aunt disapproved. So, I texted her if she could come to people's park @ 5:30pm so we could pray for her and see for a miracle ( trying exhausting every possibilities. Yan ang FAith.). And she replied that she could come. (Hay! Thank you Lord!hehe.)
So then, when I arrived to people's park. We waited for other's to come. The clock striked @ 7:00pm still I wasn't seen her. Finally, after a long time of waiting was able to come. (Sigh!hehe)
We did our prayers, and word's of encouragement and prayers! prayers! prayers again! (weeehh!! hehe) And after, we had our close cell with Nanay Langga (with *April). Nanay started the agenda of the close cell. While in the middle of close cell, Nanay asked the participants of the encounter if how was their approval with their parents, their finances and most especially if their hearts is prepared for the encounter. Thea, one of my spiritual sister tetified how God worked . Then, the question goes to *April. She said about the disapproval of her aunt and all her worries about her aunt and money. Then we suggested to text first her tita. After all the "Kamustahan" for the encounter, we closed in prayer.
So, we finally do the exhaustion of our faith for *April. but it seems she was not cooperating with us. She was so hesitant to give us the approval to text her aunt but afterwards, she gave up and viola! She finally gave us the approval.
THE STRUGGLE.
We started constructing an SMS to her aunt and keep revising it. Alas! We make-up our minds and decide to send it. The SMS goes like this:
Goodevening po tita. si megan po toh, kaibigan ni *April. Ipaalam ko lang po sana sya pra sa retreat nmin bukas ng friday 4pm hanggang sunday po. yung approval nyo nlng po ang hinihintay nya kc nakaipon na po kmi pra sa kanya. Kung gusto nyo po, tawagan nlng po nmin kau. Jesus loves you.:)
(hearts beating fast!hehe). We declared the victory for the SMS. (haha! Faith na jud ni!.) Then, message sent! (wooh!)
My heart was full of tension and prayers. I was doing the chit-chats with them to cover up my tension and while waiting for the reply of her tita.
THE PHONE CALL.
And finally, after the waiting. I received a phone call @8:30pm. I was nervous to answer the call. So then, I answered the call and greeted her aunt so nicely. Not yet to the end of my greeting -- a shouting, nagging voice prompted to my ear. (wooh! my heart beats too fast that could not barely breathe. Nail biting!).
I was so shocked. She was nagging at me, putting the blame of everything that was happened to *April. She threatened me if she would see me and I get so much insults from her, telling me to get rid of her niece. It seems like if she was right here infront of me, she would have killed me. (Thank God. I wasn't with her, face-to-faced. Thank God! Thank God!) All I do is say "Opo.. opo.. opo.." and answer her questions. While hearing all those words thrown at me, I was praying in my mind with language of the Holy Spirit. My tears wanted to flow because I was able to fully understand *April more and pity for her aunt's soul.
I was still on the phone, When I looked at Nanay and them with tension. They seemed so worried like they have discerned what has happening. I looked at *Aril and i smile at her like saying everything will be alright (I praise God for making me a strong one at that moment). And she was on her teary eyes.
Back to the call, she still on the phone and talking to me. I just don't hear all what she says and I just continued in my prayers. Then, the call just stopped.
THE STRONG MOMENT
After the call. It was pass 9pm, I went to *April and I told her to go home. She keep on asking me what does her aunt told me. But, I keep on telling her to go home and be a blessing to her family. So, we prayed to her. I decided to walked with her from people's park to claveria. While walking, i keep on telling her,
"Nak, Love ka masyado ng tita mo. And concern lang talaga siya sayo. Pagdating mo sa bahay, i-greet mo sila with a smile, bukas maaga ka magising magluto ka ng breakfast. Tumulong ka sa bahay nyo and linisan mo ang kwarto mo but don't forget to do your devotion. and pray! pray! pray jud! walay impossible kay Lord. Be a blessing. Be obedient. Treat them with love."
As I was talking with her, she was so anxious and curious about the call. I still make my self strong infront of her even if I really wanted to cry. And when we reached claveria, we said our good-byes. It felt like it was our last meeting that I really wanted to cry but still controlling my tears. I reminded her to trust the Lord in all situation and always read the bible, I hugged her and said i love you. Then we turned our back -- my heart started to break and my tears started to flow. That moment, I felt like a mother separated to her child.
I walked as fast as I could to stopped my tears while going back to people's park. When I already reached people's park, I received a text message from her saying,
"Nay, pauwiin na gud ako sa amin. Di na ako makapagpatuloy sa pag-aaral."
I really wanted to cry with prayers in my mind. With that text messsage, I knew it was really our last.
LIKE LOT.
With what happend God reminded me of my devotion with Lot (2Peter 2:7-8).
I was looking for the girls how really want to encounter God. I make a goal to send 3 girls for the retreat. Lately, I bargained to the Lord the I will just send two. Then, I bargained again to send one.
What happened to the phone call, I was in trouble and really terrible for me. ( It was the first time to experience.)
But like Lot, though he lived right and was greatly troubled by the terrible way those wicked people were living. he was a good man, and day after day he suffered because of the evil things he saw and hear. So, the Lord rescued him.
I made all efforts for my girls. Exhausting every possibilities for the Lord.
And it is somewhat funny to think that I was able to receive that phone call, feeling terrible. Saw anxious and worried faces that my heart suffered.
Definitely, God was not just checking me about in my patience. Truly, there is more than just the patience. :)
MY TESTIMONY
In all these things, God has proved that his words are alive not just a mere words. IT WAS REALLY ALIVE! :) He proved that he was able to save even just through his word. He just prove to me that his words should not be disregarded because his words really protect and guides us everyday. That situation made my ears keen to his voice. I realized that I long time ago that I said "Maninood na jud ko Lord!", I experienced ME-problems, and now OTHER-problems. Weeeeehh!! God is really changing me. It is true what when we handle people, "tudluan jud ta sa Ginoo". Yes, it was not easy to handle people, kaya kailangan jud nato magpatabang sa Ginoo. We cannot survive if we just do in our might. When we grow in the Lord, level-up pud ang mga problems. wohoho!! and im so excited to grow more with Lord. Haaaayy!! thank you Lord for everything. Lahat ng naexperience ko, wala pa jud naka-kalahati sa na experience ni Jesus. Kaya, wala tayong karapatan na mag-stop. Let's keep our mind, heart and eyes to Jesus so we cannot lose our way. Weeeehh!! Soar high! Take the Lead! Mamunga ka! All glory to God!
--------------------------------------------*April is just a code name. :) To have confidentiality of her identity. :)
